The Clothes
by twiniitowers
Summary: Eric has a passion, Hyde lost his.
1. Chasing Marilyn

_**The Clothes**_

_**a different gender story**_

_**What's not in this story: Hyde did NOT marry Sam (so she was never there), no Randy, and his father is **_

_**Bud Hyde, so no Grooves, Angie, or W.B. Eric went away but I'm keeping him in the United States and **_

_**not Africa. But Kelso still did knock up Brooke so there is a baby Betsy. This story was starting to turn **_

_**into 2 separate ones but thanks to the members of our fan fic board (Link in reviews)...I'm going to save**_

_**some of the future chapters for a different story. I know I have many unfinished stories and I promise **_

_**to finish them all. I hope everyone likes this ride. Alternative universe. Gay and gender issue themed. **_

_**Please Read and Review. **_

**Chapter 1**

**Chasing Marilyn  
><strong>

**Hollywood, California**

**January 1984**

Steven Hyde folded up a letter in his inside jean jacket pocket as he contemplated once more in his mind why

he needed to move out of Point Place to be happy. It was too crowded in that little basement by the time 1979

rolled around, not to mention, _they were ALL too old to be still hanging out in the basement with no ambition or _

_thought to their futures._ It was a sad day much like when Edna used to waste the food stamp money on

cigarettes before the laws changed, when Michael "Doofus" Kelso became the most successful one in the group.

Just because he went off to work in the Playboy Club in Chicago, it did not mean that he was the most

determined. Steven Hyde had his own dreams and when he left Point Place suddenly on January 2, 1980 he

could finally live the life he wanted to in L.A. – _as young gay man in California_.

He had a small meager job as a short order cook at one of the greasy spoons, while he wrote music reviews on

a used small Smith-Corona. The beginning surge of hair metal did not interest him as he kept his reviews on his

self-titled _Hyde Report_ to bands that followed the examples set by The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, The Who,

and, of course, Led Zeppelin. It was at the diner when he was trying to buy his illicit weed in the back alley

behind the kitchen when film director Darren Roberts, an older, known to be gay in the community, took a shine

to him, as he liked his lovers to be at least 10 years younger than him. Hyde wasn't interested in any

relationships and felt a smidgen of guilt, must have been from the influence of Mrs. Forman, over how it ended

with Jackie. What could Hyde have done in 1970s Wisconsin? He hated breaking her heart.

_He did love her, just not in that way. _

It was their young generation in the modern era that was the first to challenge the established gender roles,

but that was in terms of equality for women in the workplace and in school sports and teaching boys how to do

macramé art projects in the fifth grade. You couldn't in 1976 declare your sexual orientation any more than you

could in 1984. He practiced safe sex especially after that mysterious disease known as AIDS was starting to

target gay men with no explanation. _He didn't need a relationship_. He knew Darren would dump him when he got

"too old", but in the meantime he was going to enjoy the freedom (i.e. the perks) of having a fucking mansion at

his disposal. Plus, the pool boy, Juan, was another good fuck. He didn't speak any English, but he gave good

head. It was a few weeks before the Academy Award Nominations would be coming out and this wasn't

something that Hyde gave a shit about. He wasn't a flamboyant/light in the loafers kind-of queer like Darren's

friend Ambrose who would play piano at his infamous parties, but Darren's film about a confused woman who

has to confront her inner demons head on was nominated for Best Picture, Best Writing, and Best Director. Hyde

paid rent on his dingy little second floor walk-up, but didn't spend much time there. Yeah, he was going to enjoy

his time at the mansion while it lasted. _Relationships were for the weak-minded anyway_. Unless you were like Red

and Kitty Forman there really was no point in having one. Besides, Darren hinted last night that he wanted to

do a threesome with a female. Hyde wasn't opposed to it, there were always hangers-on at the mansion that

he could easily find some young, nubile blonde, but that would come after two things once he parked his black

and dented Chevy Monte Carlo in the 8 door garage – first a joint and second something in the kitchen from

the well-stocked supply of food. He remembered what it was like to go without. Yes, he would enjoy these

benefits and not feel ashamed nor guilty about it. Actually one of the housekeepers was pretty hot and she

wasn't going to be the type who needed her arm-twisted. He took off his shades and realized he really only

wore them when driving or when at a club. How about that? You can have real confidence, not by putting others

in their place with sarcastic remarks. When you are out of the stifling environment of Point Place, Wisconsin, you

could actually see the forest from the trees.

Hyde loved being here; there was always something new and different going on. There were no hard drugs

allowed, but Darren did like his alcoholic beverages, no wonder there was always an alcoholic character in his

films. From the spacious indoor garage, that was big enough to be an apartment like the pool house, he could

see these female figures all in the iconic Marilyn Monroe _Sever Year Itch_ subway scene halter style white

dresses, but being nearsighted, he couldn't see far away and wasn't about to wear eyeglasses and he was too

stubborn to get contacts. The Marilyn's were giggling little sprites as they ran up the stairs to the main house.

There was a pink van with the words _Cross 2 Bear_ which Hyde dismissed at the moment. Darren wasn't home as

his black 1959 Corvette wasn't in its usual spot next to the lemon yellow Vespa. If Danielle the sexy

housekeeper didn't want to take part in the threesome, he was certain one of the Marilyn's would. Ignoring the

need for the joint, he walked inside the house. It was over the top left over '70s hedonistic Hollywood with too

much gold, marbling, chandeliers, and statues, but other than that Hyde liked the house. He once thought if he

could get Darren drunk enough in a high-stakes poker game, he could win this whole house and decorate it the

way he wanted. With platinum records of his favorite bands on every wall and modern gay art paintings in the

master bedroom for a start.

"Danielle, are you here pretending to clean? I have a little proposition for you…"

That's when Hyde noticed one of the Marilyn's, with her firm ass to him.

"Hey," He slapped her rear; if you were in Darren Robert's house you had no inhibitions, there were no filters

here it was that simple.

Within a matter of seconds a can of diet soda was dropped from the fridge in an attempt to hit his boot – and

Marilyn ran, he didn't even get a good look of her face…she was quick, but he accepted this bit of play, and

for the first time in his life Steven Hyde realized that he was physically chasing a woman. It was part of the

game; you didn't show up for a Darren Roberts party if you weren't willing to play. That's how it was. Marilyn

didn't know where she was going, but ran up the side stairs and kept running and running until she was in the

attic.

She ran until she could run no more. Hyde sat on an old trunk to catch his breath.

"I'm sorry…. I guess it never dawned on me that you didn't want to be here?"

Marilyn reached for a purple scarf that was on a gray bust form, but kept her back towards him.

Hyde stood up. Why was Marilyn so quiet? Why did she grab a scarf and put it over her head like a Polish

Grandmother's babushka during the winds of Autumn?

"Hey…are you okay? I can call you a taxi if you want to go home…." He knew where Darren kept his mad money

cash.

He put his hand on Marilyn's shoulder and she jumped about 10 feet in the air. There was nowhere to go while

Hyde spun her around as the scarf fell to the floor. He had to see whom he was talking to.

_"What…the…fuck…?"_

"H-h- i, H-hyde…."

Eric Forman, his best friend since childhood who he hasn't seen since 1980 took off the Marilyn wig revealing a

peachy toned wig cap and needed to sit down. Hyde felt relieved that all this time he had been flirting with a

man after all. _And Eric Forman at that._

"Um, Forman…. what brings you…. how do you know Darren?"

"That's what you want to ask me?" Eric tried to remain calm.

"It's all I can process right now…."

"Fine…. one of my pen-pals is from Santa Monica and a few from the group I'm in…. shit…what do you care? You

haven't contacted me or the family in YEARS!"

Hyde noticed the gold wedding band on Eric's left hand. "Donna?"

"You are so self-absorbed, Hyde. You can't answer any of my questions. Yes, I'm married to Donna." Eric replied

in a matter-of-fact way.

"It was easier to leave Point Place…. so why the Marilyn get-up?"

"You are unreal, Hyde…really, you are. You make people like you; feel something for you and then you pull

away. I have to get back to Madison anyway…. I was only here for one thing and well seeing that you are

here…. I can't."

"Can't what? Oh…. and if you want to know my secrets…. I'm a gay man…. happy that you know?"

"You're impossible. My friends and I wanted to do this…and the only way it could be arranged was that our

friend from Santa Monica, _who is allowed to be true_, knew someone, who knew someone, who knows Darren and

thought we could mingle at one of his parties…."

"In drag?"

"Damn…I never thought I'd be telling this to anyone…. but I love wearing _the clothes…._I'm a t-t-transvestite."

Hyde's eyes widened…he was a gay man, who was he to judge?

"Really?"

"Yes! But, I need to get out of here and for you to stop badgering me, so could you find me some male

clothes…. please?"

"Do Red and Kitty know?"

"Yeah…and they're just SO HAPPY FOR ME! What house did you live in with me, Hyde? You know the one with

the mean dad and the lush mother who has a fucking doctor's note for the 'occasional medicinal cocktail'? The

answer is no."

Hyde took it that Donna didn't know any of this as well.

"I think there are some clothes in the red trunk by the window…. How long have you worn women's clothing?"

"The long answer or the short?"

"Surprise me."

"The moment I lived in Madison…. I couldn't risk it with Red, Kitty, you, and every kid in Point Place who used _my_

_ basement_ as their own personal hang out…. but on those days when I could sneak clothing from the women's

department at Halverson's to the men's dressing room was _PURE BLISS_!"

Eric was running on shock and adrenaline right now. The shame would come later, just like it always did. He

didn't even have time to grasp that his best friend was gay and which he wasn't aware of until today.

"Do you need a ride to the airport?"

"You can stop being a noble prince now…. bye-bye, Hyde…maybe, I'll see you in another few years…. all I ask is

that you keep my secret."

There were footsteps coming up the attic and Hyde pointed to Eric to hide behind the Japanese screens. He

knew Darren Roberts' walk.

"What are you doing up here, Steveo?" He despised that nickname, but that was thing with them, it was the

person who made them for you. To Jackie's credit she did well with christening him Puddin' Pop.

Darren was smaller than he looked in photographs, which Hyde supposed was true whenever ordinary folk talk

about famous people that they encounter they all say the same thing, "Oh, they look much smaller in real life."

He was 40 with salt and pepper hair and no waistline thanks to his personal trainer named Matthew (also

frigging hot) who came to the house on Wednesday's and Thursday's. Darren had a stoic face with gray blue

eyes. He was the WASPy version of Steven Spielberg.

"Collecting on my '75 Fender Strat."

Darren said that Hyde could have the candy apple red electric guitar if he beat him double or nothing at pinball

during a heady night in the arcade/gaming room a month ago.

"It isn't up here…." Darren smelled the scent of Giorgio Beverly Hills in the air. "But a female was…."

Why he should cover for Eric Forman Hyde didn't know why but he did. "And she left before I got up here.

D.R., I still want the guitar though."

The older gentleman smiled. He was one of those he-didn't-look-stereotypically-homosexual-types which Hyde

thought if some people got their judgmental sticks out of their collective asses long enough they would just see

that they were all human beings as well. He put his arms around Hyde's waist and pulled him in for a kiss as

Marilyn Forman watched with envy from behind the black floral Japanese screens.

_Hyde was gay….? _

How could Eric not have known this? He never exhibited any "gay behavior" before he admitted to Jackie that

he loved her, he slept with all kinds of sleazy types from resident school slut Pam Macy to popular cliquey girls

who liked to rebel in the-piss-off-the-parents-kind-of-way like Kat Peterson. He would keep Hyde's secrets as

long as the person he knew since elementary school who kept the tough red head girl's away would keep his.

When Darren and Hyde were halfway down the stairs he heard Hyde's voice say, "He'd be right back…." as he

walked back up the stairs, Hyde grabbed the antique silk mahogany brown colored smoking jacket and quietly

made his way to the screens.

"The door will be unlocked…. Bye, Forman…." Hyde said in a whispering way that Eric found sexy.

Eric put the wig back on and waved goodbye looking as defeated as he felt as his best friend went down the

stairs and closed, but not locked, the attic door, making sure that once again that he could make a clear escape.

_And then what?_

_**Author's Note: Please read and review. Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews. It is much **_

_**appreciated.**_

_** I know I have many undone stories, and I do plan on finishing them all. :) I got writer's block with **_

_**transgender Hyde in The Seduction of Eric Forman, but the idea for The Clothes was in my head for  
><strong>_

_**a while. I was on a roll writing chapters for this until a very AU Jackie came onto the scene. I'm going to **_

_**save those sections for another story. **_


	2. Marijuana in the Rose Garden

**Chapter 2**

**Marijuana in the Rose Garden**

There was something different in the night air, while there was indeed a bimbo, a red-headed/buxom/painted-

painted-red-lipped woman in the spa hot tub who was trying to "break in the business" she never made it to

Darren's master bedroom. Hyde was relieved. He could've fucked her, she could've watched him blow Darren,

but he didn't want nor need the extra person. Darren didn't even say much and he was more of a talker. Hyde

who normally didn't have much to say knew that something needed to be said, or maybe he just wanted to see

if Eric safely made it out of the attic. Darren drank his brandy with the unusual addition of ice-cubes (just two).

Hyde didn't feel like going downstairs to get a beer from the draft taps or to ask a servant to get it for him had

a red wine, but it was hardly relaxing._ God he hated talking, absolutely hated it._ Other than being in bed with D.R.

he never really had any real private time with him. Darren put his hand on Hyde's stubbled cheek.

"I'm going to take a private shower." That was fine by Hyde. "I'll see you in a bit, Steveo."

"I'll have a joint…."

"In the rose garden, please…I don't want the smell of that upstairs." That was also fine by Hyde.

It's not that he hated Darren; no that emotion was reserved for Edna, Bud, and the bullies in school before he

learned to stand up for himself. _Did he love him? No_. _He loved Jackie more than he loved Darren._ If Jackie didn't

pester him that their relationship go further, well there was also that "teensy fact" that she didn't have a penis.

Hyde thought bisexuality was a myth, you were either straight or gay, there were absolutely no shades of gray.

He got out of the hot tub and wrapped a thick, fluffy white towel around his waist. He could go downstairs like

that and give Ambrose, the Marilyn Girls, and whoever else was in the main parlor, a treat, but there were other

things that needed tending to and it sure as hell wasn't the roses.

Eric couldn't rejoin his girlfriends so after he found an old jar of cold cream in the trunk of clothes to take the

make up off, he also found an ill-fitting white button down shirt, a pair of black jogging pants with the

drawstring, and black socks, but the only shoes he had were the Marilyn strappy heel sandals and they plus the

rest of the outfit was back in its bubblegum pink box and put in the Cross 2 Bear van. His Eric clothes were

at the hotel. He decided to sit in the rose garden to relax and wished that he could just get out of here. The

place that was supposed to be his oasis for the night.

"There you are…." Hyde was almost taken a back at how vulnerable Eric looked in the moonlight as he sat on

the gray wrought-iron bench.

"You were looking for me?"

"Can't I make sure that you are okay?"

"Sorry. Um, this is more degrading than…I couldn't find any shoes."

"Do you care what kind?"

"No."

"Over there by the garden shed there should be some navy blue gardening shoes…I'd say they're about your

size…."

Eric ran as his feet were cold and how odd it was to Hyde how Eric seemed to be more graceful when he

sprinted up the attic just hours prior.

Hyde couldn't wait to light up, it was funny, when he was younger it was all about to numb himself and on

those rare occasions to allow himself to act silly with his friends and now, granted, it was still to numb himself.

But Hyde really wasn't one to act silly. He didn't have to "babysit" Kelso and Fez and that was a wonderful

feeling.

"So, where's _your boyfriend_?" Eric asked as these navy blue gardening clogs were so ugly that no gender should

be caught wearing them! He hoped that Hyde would pass him the joint.

"In the shower." Hyde replied matter-of-factly. "He doesn't like the scent of weed…"

"Oh."

"Where are the other Marilyn's?"

"Having a gay old – grand old time singing Broadway show tunes with your friend Ambrose."

"He isn't my friend."

"And there were some other celebrities there that I recognized…. but I just wanted to hide."

"That's the first part with blending in here…. don't give a shit…because at the end of the day…they're just

people…some with more money and power, but they're still people."

Hyde handed the herbal jazz cigarette to Eric, "Are you happy?"

"I could ask you the same question."

"Touche." Hyde didn't realize it until just now and maybe it was the effects of the pot that enhanced it but Eric's

voice had a very soft yet sultry tone to it. It was quite appealing.

"I just want to wear _the clothes_. But if this comes out, I'll lose my job, my wife, my ability to be stealth."

The master bedroom lights flickered on and after taking one last hit Hyde stood up.

"D.R.'s done with his shower."

"You have to leave? I haven't seen you in ages, man."

"Forman, it's different…. I'm gay. I'm still trying to sort out my life. I don't take pleasure in breaking people's

hearts like some people might think. D.R.'s been good to me. Am I happy? It depends on the context. I'm going

to acquire a Fender Strat because I'm excellent at pinball and I know how to satisfy another man….and I hate

talking and you're making me open up…."

"The drug might have something to do with it…."

"When you confront Donna and tell her that you are a transvestite than you can come back here and tell me

how to live my life. Okay?" Hyde turned around and almost gasped when Eric dropped a perfectly good not even

finished marijuana cigarette onto the ground and stepped on it with the ugly gardening clog.

He bent down to pick it up and placed it in his jeans pocket, as Eric just stood there afraid to make another

move. You just don't waste good weed. Hyde looked up to make sure D.R. wasn't looking down from his balcony

as he put his two hands on Eric's shoulders. They were steadier than he remembered. He was going to

go in for a kiss, _a kiss that he always wanted_. That Eric still left the penciled in Marilyn mole on his cheek despite

removing the rest of the make up was endearing to him.

"No," Eric waved his hand in a feminine motion to stop Hyde from going any further, "Not like this….." Not

without him wearing _the clothes_.

Hyde was the master of vague, ambiguity, and Zen, but what did Forman mean? Because he was with Darren?

He was still married to Donna or because he had to be wearing _the clothes? _Or was it a combination of all three?

He wasn't about to over think the situation.

"Fine. _Let it be known that you stopped it_. Now that I know you're safe, I can go back upstairs and be with my

boyfriend."

Eric tried not to appear wounded. He supposed he deserved it. He never should have went on this trip. Donna

thought he was at some Sci-Fi convention. Actually, there really was one going on this weekend in San Diego.

He'd have loved a Princess Leia outfit so badly. He had the two-donut like shapes on either side bad wig, but

even the original hairstyle on Carrie Fisher was pop culture iconic awful, but all that Princess Erica wanted was a

dark and broody Han Solo to take her away on the Millennium Falcon to the unknown depths of the universe 

_together._

Eric did what he always did when he was alone with his most private of thoughts, he put his hands over his

face and cried. All he wanted the most in this world was to be loved for the person that he really was. A person

that _WAS NOT ERIC_ Forman.

All he wanted was to be loved by Steven Hyde while wearing _the clothes._


	3. The Bracelets

**Chapter 3**

**The Bracelets**

Hyde awoke at 8:00 a.m. to the feel of something in the bed and it wasn't anything to do with male genitalia. It

was a sterling silver breakfast tray that contained 2 pieces of wheat toast with 1 pat of butter on each and an

egg white omelet, which was neatly folded over, with a garnish of tomato and parsley on top. He turned his

head to see a glass of orange juice on the table. There was a stiff note card with Steveo written in calligraphy

next to a small cup of fruit. He picked it up to read it.

_**Steveo, **_

_**Open the drawer. See you tonight. **_

_**D.R. **_

He moved the tray to Darren's side of the bed and opened the end table drawer. Inside was a blue Tiffany &

Co. box.

_Jewelry…he's buying me jewelry?_

This was starting to be something other than some hanging out play and sexually satisfying romps and it was

cemented by the rather stunning platinum bracelet; it was cool with the manly wide links. There was engraving

on the clasp.

**_Steveo – Thank you_**

_Thank you_ for what? All of the sex? They didn't share many deep conversations; there was that time when they

talked about the Kennedy Assassination*. Hyde was under a desk in Old Maine next Eric who shaking like a leaf

under his because people really did think that "The Ruskies" were coming out of every corner. Darren was

fucking his high school drama teacher in his 1962 Olds Cutlass. Hyde didn't know if he should wear this

bracelet, no wonder jewelry was a big deal to women. It wasn't about the jewelry piece per se (not that you

should come home to give your boyfriend something ugly and worthless) it was about what it symbolized and

Hyde had no idea what this bracelet was supposed to mean. He put it on next to his worn, had it forever, thick

leather band watch.

_What was the purpose of this?_ He chose to wear it, lest Darren pull a Jackie and start nagging him the moment

from the moment he returned home and didn't see it on his wrist. But he was going to get an answer. The

thought flashed in his mind that if he sold it he could get the repairs made to his car – or maybe even a down

payment on a new one, which was not something one should have been thinking about if their boyfriend

bought them an expensive gift such as this.

* * *

><p>Eric was safely on a flight back home to Wisconsin. The Marilyn costume was especially rented for the occasion<p>

and the make-up he disposed of in the garbage can at the hotel. He wanted to buy a comic book to make his

Sci-Fi convention lie good, but instead, when he saw something else in the gift shop, _he had to have it._ Eric

played with the bracelet that he purchased. _It was unisex. No one could call him out._ The links weren't too small

and delicate, nor were they really bold. The gender roles were starting to be widened even more, but he

couldn't risk anything. It was a beautiful sterling silver piece. _It made him feel like Erica. The woman he was when _

_he wore the clothes._ The power that came off this one item of jewelry was striking. It made him feel special and

comfortable in his own skin. He tried to get Hyde out of his mind and how perfect he looked. Yes, Eric was fully

aware that he was the one who stopped it. Hyde was so sweet and then like a snake full of venom, he

could bite you and knew exactly what pressure points to hit because _he had to protect himself from the bad in the_

_ world_. _Was Eric that bad person that Hyde had to shield himself from?_ He most likely would never see his friend

again and he was certain that both of their secrets would be kept in tact.

He'd return to his loveless marriage, _high school sweetheart! Yeah, right!_ He'd go back to his fantasies and would

secretly daydream at work that he could be one of those hot teachers who wore long flowing skirts with all of

the glorious long parted hair that was set in a bun, that one could have undone the pins for and then gyrate

after hours in a seductive dance on top of the her desk when all of the kids were gone home and your strong

and handsome boyfriend was picking you up. It figured that Hyde would be a homosexual man with _NO ISSUES_.

Eric didn't want to downplay his childhood; he knew he had it rough. Of course, Hyde would fall into a famous

movie director's bed and have use of the big majestic mansion. But Hyde never realized that Eric had it just as

rough. He used to think Red was a hard-ass until he moved in with the Forman's and thought that Eric was just

a spoiled brat. Maybe, he did take advantage of the situation and enjoyed Hyde doing his chores, but Red

_was _a hard-ass more than Hyde would ever know. Eric's eyes caught a model in the magazine that was on his

lap wearing a gorgeous shade of pale blue nail polish in the advertisement. It was blue so that was acceptable

for a man, right? He wished he could be the flirty model in the glossy pages who wore ice-glacier blue on her

perfectly manicured nails (press-ons were awful!) as she carried a clutch purse, and wore the feminine business

power suit while she wanted to be an equal player to the men in the office. While he just wanted to be pretty

and wear _the clothes._

* * *

><p>Hyde picked a strawberry from the fruit cup deciding between putting his head back on the pillow or if he should<p>

take a shower. The female Spanish accent came from of the intercom that was on the wall next to the

thermostat and scared the heck out of him.

"There's a phone call for you, Mr. Hyde, on line one."

Before he could thank Rosa, she was gone. It couldn't be Darren. He never phoned when he was in work mode.

Hyde liked that. A man needed his space and that seemed ironic to him as the sun was trying to peek in from

the window and enhanced the expensive bracelet on his wrist even more.

"Hyde, where do you want your last paycheck mailed to?" asked manager Ron from the diner. Hyde felt his

blood pressure rise. If it wouldn't have been in the tabloid rags tomorrow he would have phoned Darren on the

set to demand yet another answer.

"Ron, who told you I resigned? I made no such plans and I will be in today…. I'm leaving right now." Hyde got

up to brush his teeth and before getting dressed he took off the bracelet and placed it on D.R.'s end table.

_Thanks…. Thanks for what?_

* * *

><p>Eric was relieved when he got home that no one was there. Donna would be at work at the newspaper and Eric<p>

had today off because he knew he was going to be tired from the flight. There was something that he needed

to do. Even though Donna was gone it was still instinctive to lock the bedroom door behind him. He had to do

much detective work, lying, begging, and almost short of stealing to get a piece of high school that he wanted.

Eric had 4 huge boxes in the walk-in closet. They were all labeled _Star Wars Collectibles,_ but only one was

actually such. Tired from the flight and perplexed by all of the recent events that Steven Hyde was found and

had a secret of his own he was a gay man. Eric took the real _Star Wars_ box and placed it on the ground while he

brought the other two to his loveless bed. He was exhausted, confused, and ashamed, but nothing was going

to stop him from being a Point Place High Cheerleader complete with a sort-of "Jackie" (i.e. Marlo _That Girl _

Thomas inspired) wig. He was going to make his own postcard.

* * *

><p><strong>HOURS LATER:<strong>

That was an interesting turn of events Hyde thought. Darren was home as witnessed by the Corvette being

parked alongside the Vespa. The explanation was interesting and why Hyde didn't bolt like he would have

if he was 19 he didn't know. But this was the first time that Darren overstepped his boundaries and just

because he was a big-shot Hollywood player didn't mean that Steven James Hyde was going to be okay with

him sticking his nose in matters that weren't any of his business. He opened the door of the Monte Carlo and

heard Ambrose singing from the Judy Garland songbook _(of course, natch)._ He could only imagine how

unbearable the sound was inside the house. Hyde didn't get very far as Darren opened the side door and

walked outside to join him.

"Care to walk around the grounds, Steveo?"

He couldn't deal with Ambrose signing and the housekeeping staff and whoever else happened to be there so

taking a stroll outside seemed the lesser of two evils. Darren went to hold his hand, but Hyde pulled away.

"You have some nerve…." Hyde stated before they even got out of the garage.

"I went about this wrong, Steveo, for that I'm sorry. Will you listen?"

"I'm listening, but Darren you better listen as well, because if you think if buying me expensive gifts is going to

make me roll over and do what you say in or out of bed, well that is not going to fucking happen. Got it?"

Darren brought Hyde's hand up and kissed it. "I'm sorry…. no one knows yet, let's get further out…. and I'll tell

you what I should've told you earlier."

His gray blue eyes looked sincere so Hyde let him hold his hand. When they got by the barn that contained no

animals, but used to be the location of many parties. Darren explained why he phoned Hyde's boss from the

diner.

"After the Oscars, win or lose, I'm going to announce my retirement…. I did 7. It was a good run."

"And you crossing the line is because?" Hyde crossed his arms.

"I want us to travel together…. maybe, I went about it wrong…. but in this business…"

"You could've just asked me…. you didn't have to…forget it. I guess I can understand how you have to be close

to the vest in this town regarding business decisions. You still should've discussed this with me though."

Darren put his arms around Hyde and brought him in for a kiss as he felt the bracelet being put back around his

wrist. He could go back to the status quo as long as Darren didn't push him, because Steven Hyde did not like

being controlled. It's not like he wanted to work at the diner, but it was his decision to make. But the prospect

of enjoyable luxurious trips and smoking pot openly in Amsterdam? He could live with that. The purpose of the

bracelet and the mysterious captions of _Thank You_ would have to wait as Hyde and his older boyfriend made

their way to behind the barn to make love in the early afternoon.

* * *

><p>Eric stared at the mashed potatoes (instant and from the box) at 3:00, the roast beef (from the heat and eat<p>

tray) at 12:00, at 6:00 was the corn (from a can) and at 9:00 and nothing but misery. The love was gone and

Donna didn't even know about the cross-dressing, which made Eric feel a little bit more confident that the

divorce wouldn't happen because of his affinity for _the clothes, _but rather in spite of them. They barely said 3

sentences to each other than "How was your trip?" "The TV needs a repair." and the command that Donna

uttered before scraping her dish and putting it in the dishwasher while Eric fantasized about colored nylons,

hair bows, body glitter, Stormtroopers, an Hermes silk scarf, film cels, R2-D2 coin banks, and a bottle of nail

polish in ice glacier blue.

"Eric, take off that bracelet," she sighed, _"You look like a dink."_


	4. A Visit from Joan Crawford Part One

**Chapter 4**

**A Visit from Joan Crawford**

**Part One**

**After the Oscar Noms**

Hyde had to admit to himself that not having to work at that awful diner was a good thing. He just wanted to

make those decisions himself and ever since "their talk", Darren was _playing the role_ of a good boyfriend. Hyde

did go to the occasional club/bar to write up about bands for the _Hyde Report. _But it was an empty feeling. It

was also strange to have this morning time, weekends and non-workdays aside, with Darren. He was done

directing films and doing press for them; of course, he was the only one that knew that. Darren was only giving

one interview the day before the Oscar's, which was going to be held in the rose garden.

Hyde went to check on the mail that was in his office. Last week Darren surprised him with his own office

complete with the red Fender Strat by the back wall and a platinum record from The Who _Who's Next_ hung on

the wall. Hyde didn't get much mail, just a_ Goldmine magazine, _a catalog full of men's boots and other

accessories, and thought he was losing it and wondered why Jackie Burkhart was on a postcard. He held up the

postcard and realized it was Eric — Erica as Jackie, wearing a Point Place High School cheerleading uniform with

her ass in the air and blowing a kiss like the pictures of WWII pin-up girls taped inside a soldier's metal locker. It

was postmarked from Chicago. The back said, _I got this made….. I wanted you to see me this way. We'll probably _

_never see each other again. Life is what you make it…and I know I'm a hypocrite for writing that….stay in touch  
><em>

_please….Erica (in the dress)…Erica (in my heart)….Eric (in my pants….) Hope the postman doesn't read that part. _

Hyde didn't know why Eric wanted him to see see him - her as "Jackie"? See him as a woman again? He placed

the postcard in a guitar catalog and closed the drawer. There was a knock on the door. Steven Hyde was not

used to all of his extra free time; they better be going on their vacation as soon as the Academy Awards and

Darren's retirement announcement were over.

"Steveo….." He still loathed that nickname, "Are you busy?"

"Not really…" Yet, he was given an office. An office for doing what exactly? He didn't even have bills to pay

anymore, you think he'd have been happy about that, but he really wasn't. Something was missing.

"I have great news! Come to the movie room with me…"

Hyde let Darren hold hand as they took the small elevator to the wing of the house that contained the movie

room, arcade/sports bar, and bowling alley.

"What's going on, D.R.?"

"You'll see…."

The movie screen was missing and what was left was a small stage. Hyde sat on a red velvet cinema chair.

"You have me curious…."

"You weren't yourself and I was too stressed from being on my last movie set to even care about the party with

the Marilyn's so I made some phone calls and Cross 2 Bear is going to put on a private production of _Mommie _

_Dearest_ just for the two of us!"

"Really?"

How did Forman feel about that? They weren't a theater company. They were a private group of transvestites.

Yet, they were supposed to perform for him and his boyfriend? It was amazing what enough money and power

could buy.

* * *

><p>Eric locked himself in the bathroom in the teacher's lounge and silently cried. Damn Josephine from Santa Monica<p>

with her connections to Darren Roberts! And of all the gay men in the whole state of California Steven Hyde had

to be Darren's boyfriend! Now they were all gah-gah over performing of _Mommie Dearest _for Darren who was up

for a few Academy Awards like always. And his boyfriend…. his boyfriend that was Steven Hyde!

Eric didn't know what to do. The trip that went bust without any puns intended was supposed to be his chance

to be feminine in a non-stilted environment because even the Cross 2 Bear meetings were rather clinical to him.

The Marilyn's were supposed to put on a concert for Darren and all that Eric wanted to do was _wear the clothes _

and was content to play a back-up Norma Jean. Now he was being pressured that he was perfect to play the

troubled actress. How could he even get there? Donna wasn't going to buy another Sci-Fi convention not when

there was one in Milwaukee at that time. While there were some glamorous acts, that's not what people

expected. They wanted to see Joan in all of the campy glory, the no-wire hangers, the axe to the rose bush he

saw the movie, he knew what was expected him if he agreed to do it. The make-up was beautiful or harsh

depending which side of Joan was being acted out.

_No Wire Hangers, EVER!_

Eric really didn't know what he was going to do. If this got out he could lose everything, his predictable

marriage that only served for a break in his taxes, his job teaching the children of Point Place, and his parents.

Red and Kitty would never accept this side of him. Yet, this was a private production, and Eric wasn't the only

one who had something to lose if this became a habit. He looked at his almost unisex Timex with the brown

leather band and then wiped his eyes. It was a chance to go to California again. It was a chance to see Steven

Hyde once again. He missed him so.

_It was a chance_.

* * *

><p>When Darren left the room because there was a staffing issue Hyde put his head back in the chair noticing the<p>

movie screen that was hanging up above the stage. Hyde stroked his bracelet and how out of his place his

simple and worn watch looked next to it or was it the other way around?

"What are you thinking about?" Darren asked sitting next to him.

"Do I really need to sit through a production of such a gay play?"

These were how stereotypes were formed. Just because Hyde was a homosexual man did not mean he was

a part of the flamboyant gay man culture that guys like Ambrose embraced and that Darren was somewhere in

the middle of.

"Not if you don't want to, but it'll be fun, Steveo." Darren put his hand on the inside of his thigh.

Hyde directed Darren's hand to his belt buckle maybe he'd be able to think more clearly after his boyfriend

gave him a hand job.

* * *

><p>When Donna was in the shower Eric was using the downstairs kitchen phone in a hurried and whispered way.<p>

But yet it was an opportunity to use the feminine voice that he spent years crafting in private.

"Yes…yes...I'll do it…. I'll be your Joan…."

Eric sighed heavily and hung up the phone. He needed to pour himself a scotch on the rocks….he was Joan

Crawford after all or at least he would be when he was wearing _the clothes_. He was excited for another chance

to see Steven Hyde and for now that would have to do.

**Author's Note: To be continued...**


	5. A Visit from Joan Crawford Part Two

**Chapter 5**

**A Visit from Joan Crawford**

**Part Two**

It was the little things that made a person happy and Donna wanting to lecture some high school students on

the _art of journalism_ on a Saturday was more than fine by him! In fact, it was super fine! Eric could finally lock

the doors, pull down the shades, and dress in _the clothes_. _The clothes _that brought him such joy and actual

physical relief.

He was supposed to buy something Crawford-ish, but when he saw that dress in Halverson's and lied

that he was buying it for his older sister, _he had to have it!_ It was a black wrap dress, so it was easy to get in

and out of. He was able to stuff his padded pink bra with handkerchiefs and it gave some extra form to the top,

the heels were black and patent. He shouldn't have skipped the hosiery, but he didn't have time to struggle

getting them on. He put the _Mommie Dearest_ script down; they were doing it line by line, not editing a thing out.

It wasn't his concern how things like the swimming race with Christina were supposed to be done if they were

on Darren Roberts' stage. All he had to know was his lines and that was easy after all he was Mushroom #2 in

_Alice in Wonderland _and he knew all of the _Star Wars _movies by heart.

Eric sat on the floor like a child surveying their Halloween candy haul with all of his cosmetics strewn about on

the beige living room rug. How he wished he could be Erica when he and Donna (not that she mattered) went

out for the once-a-month-dinner with his folks at the Vineyard. Eric took out a Chanel lipstick, the light bill was

short that month and it was worth hearing the Donna rant, when he was able to go to Neiman Marcus in

Chicago and said to the salesgirl that he wanted to buy his wife the most wonderful lipstick for Valentine's Day.

No. It was for Eric's internal Valentine's Day in a wearable red shade, or at least that's what the salesgirl

stated. It was a little bit on the dark side, but all Eric had to do was whip out his retractable lip brush and go

lighter with the application technique. This was how he wanted to look for Steven. He didn't want to be Marilyn

Monroe or Joan Crawford. He wanted to be who he was inside: Erica Forman. Hyde wanted, even though he

had a boyfriend, he wanted to kiss him in the rose garden. This wasn't realistic so why was he thinking about

it? There were times when Eric saw Hyde and Jackie kiss and he had to hide the fact that he had tingly in the

pants feelings for the man in the room. He certainly had more passion than Donna that was for certain. Eric

cupped his hand over his mouth at over his private thoughts. Eric and Hyde together? No. _Hyde had a boyfriend_,

a wealthy and successful one at that and he doubted that he would even want to be in a long-term relationship

with a man who wanted to wear _The Clothes _even if they shared a coming-of-age history. Eric stood up and did

a twirl to see his wrap dress sway and go back on his legs. If this was sinning so fucking be it. It made him look

beautiful, it was a fair trade. He just had to get the idea of being with Steven Hyde as a permanent fixture out

of his mind.

* * *

><p>Darren had his hands on Hyde's shoulders and waited for the cook to leave before taking a manila folder off the<p>

gray marble counter top in the kitchen.

"Here you go, Steveo."

"What's this?"

Hyde looked at the plain manila envelope that was placed upon his empty breakfast plate. No fancy cook could

make scrambled eggs and bacon half as good as Mrs. Forman. Her cooking talents aside, he really missed her

and Red as well, but he didn't think they'd accept him as a gay man and he didn't want to lie to them so hence

his reasoned absence from the family. And he didn't even factor in how they would have handled Eric's secrets.

"Open it and see. Want a refill on your coffee?"

"No, thanks, D.R."

They were glossy travel brochures for Europe, the Caribbean, and the Orient.

"You can read those over and see where you'd like to go, if it's an incentive, I do have use of Andrew

Rickman's private island off Jamaica."

Another famous Hollywood power player.

Hyde didn't know if Eric was going to be a part of their private theater performance, but Cross 2 Bear was

literally becoming that. He smiled graciously. Mrs. Forman wisely said once to pick your battles, it was true

advice to take to heart no matter what kind of relationship you were in.

"I'm going to read these in my office…."

Darren went on about phone calls, press, and other assorted nonsense regarding the Oscars. Hyde would give

Darren points for the fact, that his home was always home, not a place that business was done in, except for

some phone calls and rare visits that mostly took place in his office. _Yet, there weren't sparks. There never was._

Maybe, that all had do with teenage hormones and nothing to do with love at all. There were verbal sparks

with Jackie, someone had to set her straight, pun not intended. Maybe during that brief period when he shared

a room with Forman he could've and should've opened up about his sexuality and Eric could've gotten his

gender issues off his chest. It occurred to Hyde in the deep recesses of his mind that were just starting to come

to the surface. Was Forman gay? Hyde went in for a kiss, but it was Eric who backed away. Statistically most

cross-dressers were heterosexual males who had wives and wanted to keep it that way. If Forman were gay

Hyde had to stop the train of thought. He was with Darren, and there was no guessing that they were both

gay men. He went in his office and reopened the envelope to read about what locations to visit and then he

would have a joint in the rose garden, and wondering what exactly in life, what choices he made in that life,

that precisely got him here.

* * *

><p><strong>A week later<strong>

Eric locked himself in the bathroom at home and cursed Donna under his breath. "What's with the Sci-Fi

conventions, Eric? Are you having an affair?" Eric didn't want to have the fight anymore so he locked the door to

the bathroom and with shaky hands put on the lipstick, it was an unflattering frosty pink shade that wasn't right

for his coloring not like his perfect Chanel was_, but it was still lipstick! _He had it hidden in an empty bottle of

Epsom salts that he kept in the back cabinet in the bathroom. Even if he had _the clothes _on nothing looked

really right, there was not a padded bra big enough to give him the breasts that he so desperately wanted.

_Fuck Cross 2 Bear! _

Eric didn't care if he was going to be seen as a traitor to the ladies of his group, but he was going to fly solo

and if Steven Hyde lived at the mansion then this shouldn't be an issue of Eric just "arriving" at famous

Hollywood director Darren Roberts' big estate! He would do his part in the play after all he made a commitment,

but there were other things that made Eric sit in the bathroom for another hour before Donna fell asleep. He

was going to California! _He was going to see Steven Hyde!_ He was going to be able to walk around a huge

mansion while wearing _the clothes. _Eric wondered if Hyde would have an affair and cheat on Darren? Eric smiled

as he left the house under the dark of night, with traces of pink lipstick on, _naughty naughty girlboy_. He really

wanted to find out.

* * *

><p><strong>Next day<strong>

Things didn't go exactly Eric's way when he arrived back at the Roberts' estate. He told Darren over the

intercom in his sexy voice, it surprised Eric that a major behind-the-scenes A-lister would be home, that he

would like to change in the spacious garage before entering. It was NOT a problem. Darren offered use of the

poolhouse and Eric declined. He wondered where Hyde was? Unfortunately, all of the Cross 2 Bear girls

were arriving in costume, so he had to get into Joan mode. And they weren't doing a caricature of what the

characters would look like, which was sometimes the case when cross-dressers did productions of plays like

_Mommie Dearest_, they were being true to the era and Eric hated having to max out his already maxed out credit

cards to buy the Joan wigs. But Josephine called Trixie and said this was a production for Darren Roberts, so

they shouldn't cut corners! Eric normally wouldn't have minded, it pissed him off when some cross-dressers

didn't even bother to go for glamorous but showed ugly chest and facial hair and didn't make an effort to

conceal their masculinity, (in fact some heightened it for satire's sake) to Eric, they weren't being true. Not

paying attention to his surroundings and why Eric chose to dress in Joan's certainly non-sexy nighttime attire

always white silk pajamas, a bathrobe, and white stocking feet was beyond his conscious as he started to

rattle off lines from the movie.

_"I would rather be here with you than anywhere else in the world. You, all of you here and everywhere, gave _

_me this award tonight. And I accept it from you and only you. I love all of you. Now please forgive me, good _

_night."_

Those lines were from when Joan won the Academy Award in 1946 for _Mildred Pierce_ and while she wasn't

present for the ceremony because she was "ill" it still became a PR spectacle with the press at her house.

His heart wound up in his throat when he heard the sound of faint applause. He quickly turned around.

"H—Hyde, what are you doing here?"

"I live here."

Eric blushed more than the bit of rouge he put on his face. How could Hyde look the same in a Led Zeppelin

t-shirt, jeans, and brown boots. Eric thought it was most attractive that he was so comfortable in his male skin.

"I w—was," Eric took a deep a breath as Hyde stood in front of him not showing any emotion at all. Damn him

for being so pulled together, "just getting into costume. I talked to Darren…"

"You met, D.R.?"

"If talking through the intercom means met then yes. He offered me use of the pool house, but I wanted to

change here. Where's your car?"

"Getting repaired." Hyde didn't like being driven home in a limousine by driver Tom. He thought he would have

loved that, but he didn't. He wanted to be in control where he drove on the road.

"Remember when you were going to do something in the rose garden and I stopped you? Well, granted, these

are not the clothes that I'd like to be wearing and this hair is all Joan Crawford…but… I really want you to kiss

me…" Eric walked backwards, _"Ever since I was 12 years old…."_

Hyde put his hands on Eric's shoulders as his back went against the garage wall and it seemed that it was the

first time he noticed how beautiful yet vulnerable his green eyes were. He was about to go in for a kiss not

trying to think of the fact that he wanted to since he was about the same age as Forman when the door

opened.

"Steveo, you're back. Did you get your passport done all right?"

"Yes after I took the car in for a repair."

_Passport?_ Eric thought _Where were they going?_ Darren had his arm around Hyde and Eric wondered what in the

heck he was doing? He couldn't break them up. _It wasn't right_. _He didn't want to be the other man…other_

_woman…other girlboy._ He didn't want to be the one responsible for being the one that caused Hyde and

Darren's relationship to dissolve.

"And I couldn't wait any longer and had to meet our Joanie…."

Eric politely corrected the director, "It's Erica…"

Hyde laughed on the inside. When D.R. had a nickname for someone that was it. Even during the heat of the

moment he could never call him Steven in bed, it was always Steveo. If Darren Roberts wanted to refer to

Eric—Erica—as Joanie then it was going to be a forever fact.

"I like that you traveled here all by yourself. You show some real moxie, just like the real Joan Crawford."

"Does that mean you want me to destroy your rose garden with an axe?"

Eric was pissed that he didn't get to kiss Hyde…_he knew also wanted it…_but not this way. Yet Darren did have

sexy blue-gray eyes and a fit body so he could see why Hyde would be conflicted. He was quite handsome in

that older college professor way.

"You're as cute as a button."

"Thanks, Darren." Was all that he could think to say as he noticed Hyde did not try to break free. _He must have_

_had some love - some feelings- for him._

"Please call me D.R., Let me get someone to help you with your things…"

Eric needed a rest and agreed. "I'd like to take a nap. I'm tired from my trip."

"Of course. If you need anything don't be afraid to ask…" He kissed Hyde on the lips and Eric wondered at that

moment what a kiss from Darren would feel like? Eric thought Hyde would have stayed behind but he gazed at

Eric with what seemed like _I want you eyes_ and followed Darren back into the house.

"Damn it…." Eric sighed as he tried to put his luggage and supplies together in one easy pile, "Even Joan

Crawford can get the blues."

And so could Eric/a Forman.

**Author's note…I don't own the _Mommie Dearest_ dialogue.**


	6. Tears in the Guest Bedroom

**Chapter 6**

**Tears in the Guest Bedroom**

Eric didn't know what to do. The only thing he was good at was to weep when no one could see him. He had to

take the Joan costume off and be comfortable in _the clothes_ of his choosing. He had a wig made that matched

his own hair coloring with slight blonde highlights, he got styled by a hair technician in Chicago with wavy,

bouncy curls. It cost one-fourth of the mortgage and he told Donna he wasted it on a "bad investment" and yet

the verbal abuse for the hour after dinner was totally worth it. He kept it in a safety deposit area of the Point Place

Savings and Loan. He wore the sexy black wrap dress and as each day went by he felt that the shame factor

went way up. _He didn't have any breasts._

He didn't hear the knock on the door or the two _different_ hands placed on his shoulders.

"Joanie," Where was Hyde? "What's wrong?"

Eric was embarrassed. He didn't want anyone to see him crying. He just couldn't help it. Next to masturbation it

was his only real release.

"Nothing, D.R. – I hope you aren't angry at me…I don't want to take part in that silly meet and greet today with

the other girls…."

He worked with many a temperamental actor. _This fragile girl had nothing to worry about. _

"That's okay. What's wrong?"

"I—I-can't vent with you…."

"Why not? It's not good to keep it all inside."

"I'd rather be alone…if that's okay? But I know everyone flew in just to put on this production for you…" _and _

_Hyde?_ "So I will still do my part tomorrow."

Darren smiled. She was so sweet. "I tell you what, Joanie…," when everyone is done after the official meet and

greet party…you can join Steveo and I for a private dinner…._in my quarters_."

What did the famous director mean by that? He was a fan of Darren's work. He saw _Noir _before he even

dreamed of putting on the Marilyn Monroe persona for the sing-a-long that didn't happen in Darren Roberts'

mansion or knowing that Steven Hyde, who was out of his life for years, was his boyfriend! Before he found

Cross 2 Bear, he saw _Elegy_, a coming-of-age story about a gay teenager in the rural Heartland. Now, D.R. was

treating him like a person with absolutely no judgment and wanting him to take part in a private dinner with Hyde

…_in his own private quarters. _

_How scintillating!  
><em>

Eric was hesitant at first. "Sure…it really is a dinner?"

D.R. laughed but it was understood that it was with him and not at him. "Of course, Sweetie. You're too pretty

to be crying."

Eric felt better at the moment, but he still needed to take another nap. He wondered how Hyde was going to

react to this private dinner thing? He hoped favorably. But Eric Forman was starting to feel a mild disturbance

to the good in the force. He set the alarm clock that was by the bed. He wanted to take a bubble bath and get

ready for this _private dinner_ and the swirling thoughts of what came after that was in his brain that he couldn't

deny that feeling even if he wanted to. 

_And he didn't want to._

* * *

><p>Hyde <em>let Darren <em>give him a back massage after their heated tryst in the hot tub. D.R. obviously took a liking to

Forman. Hyde admitted to himself that he felt no sparks with his boyfriend. He didn't despise Darren. _It was just _

_complicated._ Would it have been any less confusing if Darren worked in some menial job? Hyde always knew

how to make a good deal. Bob asked him to take photos when he renewed his vows (what a joke that turned

to be!) with Midge and he passed the task on to Leo while pretending to have a glass eye. He made a profit

and half a meatball sub. Now what could Hyde do? It was probably a big deal for Eric and Hyde kept that in mind

when D.R. told him that "Joanie" was nervous thinking they were going to have a threesome. The older man

thought Eric was "Sweet" and Hyde tried to conceal his jealousy. He may not have felt the romantic soulmate

embers with D.R. _but how come his own fucking __older__ boyfriend didn't think he was sweet? _Still without any ulterior

motives or plan to use the situation for any gain, Hyde _would let_ Eric have this moment.

He was supposed to be his best friend after all.

* * *

><p>Eric couldn't help but cry in bed. He must have been sobbing in his sleep because his pillow was moist. He was<p>

fifteen (well actually fourteen) minutes ahead of the alarm clock and turned it off. He should've been excited, but

in all actuality he was terrified. Scared of what he didn't know. It must have been the unknown fear itself that

Roosevelt spoke of. There was a knock on the door and he put the covers over his head. Whether it was D.R. or Hyde,

he really didn't want to see either one of them at the moment.

"Forman…"

_Oh, Shit…_

"Did I say you could come in?" Damn…when he should have been automatic in his female voice, but it came out in

his much despised Eric tone. He'd have been more conscious of it all if only he had his 36-C cups.

Hyde didn't know whether to go in the room or to instinctively pull back. This had to be all new for Eric who was

leading such a secret life in Point Place/Madison that this could be way too much instant freedom. If he learned

anything from the Jackie experience and the fresh-from-the-oven-when-she-wasn't-being-a-stereotypical-

menopausal-basket case-advice of Mrs. Forman it was to be a little bit more empathetic. Plus, as Kenny Rogers

sang, _you got to know when hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away, know when to run, when _

_you're sittin' at the table, there'll be time enough for countin', when the dealin's done. _

Hyde retreated but not before saying, "Dinners at 9." as he closed the door. And by dinner he meant the private

one with D.R. in the latter's _private quarters._ The other Cross 2 Bear ladies must have been there by now, he felt he

was letting them down, one on the list of the many people that he felt that way about. They probably thought he

was a snob arriving on his own and was now in D.R.'s personal orbit. Josephine with her connections didn't even have

this. Eric turned over on his side as he heard the sound of rain hitting the window. Great. The weather matched

his mood. He didn't ask for this! It wasn't a choice. He wanted to be normal as normal could be. Normal as

society saw it. The teacher who doesn't complain, the dutiful husband that obeys his wife with the gender roles

reversed, the son who would mow the lawn and do yardwork for the father who was getting up in years. The

person who could live without a soul from now until his dying day. Eric wished he could be that person! Men

didn't buy special order wigs, men didn't hide cosmetics, men didn't test drive press on nails and secretly wore

knee-high stockings under his socks, and men didn't want to acquire breasts. Yet, here he was in Darren

Roberts' swanky mansion invited to have dinner with him in his private room with Steven Hyde, his best

friend. His former best friend? What was their label now? Eric knew he had to snap out of his latest round of

self-hatred, he had to be in the zone to be Joan Crawford for the private production of _Mommie Dearest. _But most

importantly and without rancor he had the permission, the go-ahead, to get dolled up and be glamorous

tonight. _To be the woman that society denied._ Life presented himself with an opportunity to be pretty and Erica

Forman was going to grab the brass ring! He wiped his tears away and prayed that force would be with him.

**Author's Note: I don't own the lyrics to _The Gambler. (Written by: Don Schlitz, 1978.)  
><em>**


	7. Dinner for Three Part One

**Chapter 7**

**Dinner for 3**

**Part One**

Steven Hyde sat on the white bench that was in the master bathroom. It was a misnomer to refer to this as a

bathroom when it was as big as Edna's living room, kitchen, and then some. He was buttoning up his gray dress

shirt. No way was he going take part in this whole _Mommie Dearest_ thing. He had nothing against the

sexual/gender proclivity. It was stupid. Yes, Darren was a great director; at least he had a good work ethic. He

never saw any of his films, but he did put many hours in and Hyde could respect that. But even if Eric/a Forman

had nothing to do with this, putting on a private production of this play for Darren's benefit was an

ego-thumping exercise and his _boyfriend, lover, friend _(he didn't know which) was more down-to-Earth than that.

Darren used to be quite the player and there used to be many a party, no hard drugs allowed, but parties

nonetheless. When Darren started filming _Noir _Hyde found some photo albums in the study that were on the

brass and glass coffee table._ His boyfriends who were always younger_. The summer of 1980 was the summer of

Ben. He had long blonde hair, blue eyes, and he could pack a tight red Speedo. Darren didn't look any different

in the pictures. He was less gray, but his emotions were the same. There didn't seem to be togetherness with

Ben. The boyfriend before Hyde was named Rafer. He was quite striking with model precision features, a more

suave and sophisticated European version of Kelso, but probably without the doofus factor. But there didn't

seem to be many pictures of them together. Once again Darren's emotions looked the same. The parties died

down and Hyde wasn't in many photographs with Darren, partly due to his treasuring his privacy a little too

much. He hoped that Darren wasn't hoping for Hyde to be his date for the Oscars. This wasn't even counting in

the Eric quotient. Eric had many emotions, he could panic and be nervous and fully aware that he ruined things

while the destruction happened, but he could also be sweet and replace one's dead cat with a new one. Hyde

put on his custom made black leather boots (the one thing he allowed himself to buy with Darren's Centurion,

aka _The Black American Express card_) and walked over to the mirror and triple sinks. He could do without the

dusty pink marble. But that was Darren, he wasn't flaming and lisping like Ambrose with his too-tight and overly

trendy frocks, pink Mohawk, and singular dangling earring, but he wasn't in keeping with 100% maleness like

Hyde. He supposed that's what made _his partner_ such a great director. Hyde put on his cheap Old Spice cologne

and straightened his silver bolo tie, knowing in the deep recesses of his mind that no matter what his feelings

were for Darren that this was all for Eric/a's benefit and nothing more.

* * *

><p>Eric tried not to cry. No mascara was truly waterproof. No matter how much he stuffed his bra or how much<p>

padding was in the bra before he stuffed, they were not real breasts. He put on his favorite Chanel lipstick and

looked at his transformation in the mirror. He still wore the black wrap dress, but made sure to give it a steam

from the iron that housekeeping supplied. He let his hands travel from his ankles to his thighs. Nothing beat the

feeling of sheer silky hosiery. The next step was to put on his black pumps with an asymmetric buckle strap and

_to not keep the men… (his men?)_ waiting.

* * *

><p>Hyde let out a smile after Darren kissed him as Hyde smoothed the shoulders on Darren's black blazer. He<p>

couldn't deny that the man was attractive.

"D.R., are you done with the festivities downstairs?"

"Yes, Steveo. Let me phone the kitchen and tell them to bring up dinner before our Joanie arrives…"

_your Joanie, MY ERICA…._

"Make sure I get a bottle of Coke."

"Better than a vial of it. Although, I don't know why you don't like mineral water, Steveo. It's better for you."

"It has no taste…."

"Fair enough…." Darren pulled him closer.

Damn it if he wasn't starting to feel something for _this one._

* * *

><p>Why was Eric's heart beating so rapidly? It almost reminded him of <em>Prom Night. <em>He thought that, that night might

have been the evening he lost his virginity to Donna. He did want to experience what sex with a woman was

like. He loved feeling her up in the Vista Cruiser and imaging that her ample breasts were on his body. It was

supposed to be him in long jewel-toned colored dress dancing with Hyde as the whole junior class (plus one

sophomore Jackie) of Point Place looked on in shock and awe. When the door closed behind him he realized he

was out of the only guestroom that was even near the master bedroom. Wherever the other Cross 2 Bear

ladies were they weren't on this floor. His heels didn't click because of the red plush carpet runner. _Red carpet. _

_Ha ha. _It seemed a rather long walk to only go down a hallway, turn right, and go through the archway. Shit.

He wanted to run, but he knew he could only go forward. _No one ever got anywhere in life by running away._

* * *

><p>Hyde broke a crunchy breadstick in half as he heard Darren gush, "Aren't you the picture of lovely, Joanie…" He<p>

kissed Eric on the cheek.

"Thank you." But Darren was right. Eric did look gorgeous, but that was hardly the point.

"What would you like to drink?" Darren directed Eric to the buffet station that was near the bar area. His room

was like one of those big luxurious hotel suites that he could only dream about. There were all of these places

before you even got to the bedroom area.

"Just tea."

"Honey, you can certainly have more than tea…"

Hyde needed to pour his Coke into a glass that contained ice and scotch.

"Well, maybe just a little cocktail." Eric glanced over at Hyde and winked, "You certainly didn't have to go

through any trouble for me…I bet the ladies are quite pissed off at me. I can do the show tomorrow."

Hyde smirked internally.

"Don't you worry about them. Steveo, why are you so quiet?"

"He's just being Zen. Did Steven tell you that we grew up together in Point Place, Wisconsin?" And that was

after just one sip of the gin and tonic with a twist of lime in a textured glass.

_Forman!_

But Darren had a bit of Zen about him and wasn't going to go on about his boyfriend keeping secrets. They

didn't have that kind of relationship. Hyde didn't know why this was bothering him so, but it was.

"No, he didn't…."

The phone on the bar rang and Darren went to answer it giving Hyde the perfect opportunity to ignore Eric's

rather nice perfume and whisper in her ear.

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing…"

Darren hung up the phone. "Joanie, Steveo, I apologize for this, but when the head of one of the studios shows

up unannounced, I have to see what he wants. The staff should be bringing up dinner shortly, feel free to start

without me."

Eric watched as Darren and Hyde exchanged a kiss before the older man left the room.

"Now why are you acting so rude?" Eric asked

"You want to start with the questions, Forman?" Eric hated being called by his surname when he was in _the _

_clothes._ "Was it any of your business?"

"How was I to know you didn't tell _your boyfriend _the basic information as to where you were from?"

Hyde walked over to the bar to make himself a drink. He wanted to be sober at least until the first dinner course

was served. _He wanted to be at his best for Eric/a, but she didn't seem to be appreciate any of his efforts in doing _

_so._ The private interphone system rang and although he didn't want to Hyde felt compelled to answer it.

"Hello? Yeah. Okay. Thanks."

"You're always so terse."

"And this is new to you? For your information dinner is about to be ready."

"I'm not hungry." Eric crossed his arms and wished that he had real breasts to be able to push them up just to

see if Hyde would still be angry or if would he pick her up and place her in bed for a night of lovemaking?

"So now you are going to pout? You know who you remind me of at this moment?"

Normally in the scheme of the present Eric wouldn't have minded being compared to Jackie. She had beautiful

hair, skin, _and her clothes!_ Eric was always secretly envious of her before she even locked lips with Hyde. Since

Eric rarely saw her at school in the early days, he always looked forward to seeing her arriving in the basement

to see what perfect-little-outfit she had on. He envied the fact that society okayed Jackie and the rest of the

female population to be pretty..._but god forbid if he wanted - and needed - to do the same._

"Don't say it…"

"Actually, you're worse than Jackie…because she didn't know ANY of this. You know about me…"

"Only because of a chance meeting, honey."

"Whatever and don't you call me honey in that tone. Regardless of how long, you know about me. And I don't

know what you're trying to prove."

"I think you are jealous that your boyfriend has a crush on me."

Hyde let out a laugh. "Jealous?"

"Are you deaf?" Eric felt the need to keep his hands busy and went to check out the tray of appetizers that

were on the bar.

"You know what, Steven? I think your little safe bubble popped."

"Be careful, Forman…your male voice is showing."

Unintentional or not that was certainly an arrow to the heart. Eric put down the plate that only had 1 thin

crackly wheat cracker and a piece of cubed cheese on it.

"_Fuck you…"_ Eric hoped the tears wouldn't come. He cried enough lately.

Hyde couldn't respond and Eric cleared his throat as the French doors opened and the staff brought up their

dinners.

"Mr. Roberts will be upstairs shortly."

Hyde said his thank yous and Eric sat on the sofa in the small TV area. It was there that he saw from another

archway view a set of closed French doors that must have lead to the bedroom area. This wasn't how the night

was supposed to go. Hyde wasn't the type to offer up apologizes so Eric felt he better say something.

"Are you hungry?" Hyde asked coming in to view.

"Not really. Listen, Steven, I'm sorry, okay? Can we just sit together?"

Hyde sat down there was no room on this sofa and there was many a time when he and Darren..."I'm sorry

about what I said about your voice." That was tied into his gender and sexuality that Hyde knew especially as a

gay man that, that was a cheap shot to make and never mind that it was to Eric. _His best friend._ Whatever

happened to those days? When Hyde would sit in his claimed white chair from Mrs. Forman's very first kitchen

chair and table set as Eric would sit on the battered old beige sofa and Hyde would wonder what tasting him

would be like? The cross-dressing did not matter and it slightly bothered Hyde on _why it didn't matter. _He

couldn't judge anyone even Ambrose-the-Queer. But why was Eric in the female form so attractive? Without

thinking he put his arm around Eric/a and whispered, "Is this what you want?"

"Yes. Is my voice back to where it should be?"

"You're perfect," Eric thought that wasn't true at all, "_you're just so perfect_…"

Eric wasn't about to go into detail about until he had breasts he wasn't perfect by any stretch of the

imagination. But it was wonderful when the rugged Han Solo kissed the fair Princess Leia as they stretched out

on the rather small, as Kelso would call it, the seat of love. One of Eric's dreams came true as Hyde kissed him

soft and tender, yet with just little hints of roughness that had Eric wanting even more. Eric was about to _take a _

_risk_ and that's when he noticed Darren watching them.

_**Author's Note: Sorry for the cliffy. To be continued...**_

**_Also thanks to my regular reviewers. You guys are great!_  
><strong>


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